Category: Devotion

Leaders Must Guard Their Integrity

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As men, we must constantly be on guard in walking with integrity. People are looking even when we think they are not. More than likely, all of us have broken some sacred trust, perhaps to our wife, kids, or close friend. It’s not easy to live up to the expectations of others, but we break trust by not living up to the standard we have set for others. Hypocrisy might be an accurate word. King David is one of my favorite men in the Bible; he was so great in the eyes of God and men, but he was also so stupid at times.

The life of King David was filled with numerous triumphs, conquests, and successes. He took down Goliath all by himself with a sling and a stone. He wrote many of the psalms from which we find comfort in our times of difficulty. He led the nation of Israel and was considered by many to be its greatest leader. But he had a darker side that was eventually exposed by the prophet Nathan. Surely the sins of David would find him out.

I gave you your master’s house and his wives and the kingdoms of Israel and Judah. And if that had not been enough, I would have given you much, much more. Why, then, have you despised the word of the LORD and done this horrible deed? For you have murdered Uriah the Hittite with the sword of the Ammonites and stolen his wife. — 2 Samuel 12:8-9

David also learned a harsh lesson about the importance of trust. While sitting on his rooftop one day (2 Samuel 11:2) when he should have been at war (2 Samuel 11:1), he saw Bathsheba bathing and sent for her. This act led to adultery, the murder of Uriah the Hittite, and a cover-up of the whole situation (2 Samuel 11:14-15). Only when the prophet Nathan confronted David about his actions did the king ask God for forgiveness (2 Samuel 12:7, 8, 9, 13). However, the Lord did not let David off easy. The child he fathered with Bathsheba died (2 Samuel 12:14), there was a constant threat of murder in his family (2 Samuel 12:11-12), and his son Absalom caused David problems until he was killed in battle (2 Samuel 18:9, 14-15).

When someone is trusted with a leadership role, they are given the opportunity to use their talents, time, and influence for causes bigger than themselves. As they make good decisions while showing integrity and concern for others, they earn trust. John Maxwell says this is like putting change in your pocket. When a man betrays that trust, it becomes difficult to regain. The leader has to pay some of their change back to the people. When someone runs out of change, trust is gone. When trust is gone, the leader ceases to be a leader.

King David’s story should serve as a reminder of the importance of trust and how quickly it can disappear. Men, allow God to mold and refine your character so that your decisions will inspire others to trust your abilities.

What Makes a Happy Marriage?

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I Love my wife, I guess you already knew that. Kim and I have been married for almost 29 years, and one thing I have realized is that words like commitment, security, friendship and shared values are much more influential in a marriage than outward appearance and sexual activity. I’m surprised she stays with me because I’m not much to look at, a bit overweight, don’t make a whole lot of money, spend too much time at work and am physically broken which limits some of my activity. We have something that the world does not understand. When I think about love, this verse comes to mind:

Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud or rude. It does not demand its own way. It is not irritable, and it keeps no record of being wronged. 1 Corinthians 13:4-5

Love is not just all things erotic as we see in our culture. Love is not really that warm fuzzy feeling when she walks in the room. Love is a verb. All that Paul describes in this love passage involves action.

In our culture, marriages are falling apart. In fact, according to recent statistics, one out of two marriages will end in divorce. The magazine, Psychology Today (June, 1985) had an article called “Marriages Made to Last,” which gave the results of a survey by Jeanette and Robert Lauer of 300 couples with successful marriages. Here are the top reasons, in order of frequency, that the respondents gave when asked what kept them together.

Remarkably, the top seven were identical for men and women:

  1. My spouse is my best friend.
  2. I like my spouse as a person.
  3. Marriage is a long-term commitment.
  4. Marriage is sacred.
  5. We agree on aims and goals.
  6. My spouse has grown more interesting.
  7. I want the relationship to succeed.

Other reasons included “We laugh together,” “We agree on a philosophy of life,” “An enduring marriage is important to social stability,” and others.

I couldn’t help but notice that these reasons are totally consistent with biblical principles and opposite to the message of our culture. Popular songs, books, and shows emphasize superficiality and sexual stamina (notice any Cealis commercials lately?), but these successful couples spoke about liking the other person and about being friends. Society implies that relationships happen quickly, but these folks said that love takes time, and that there must be a long-term commitment.

Contemporary views of love are self-centered, expecting the other person to meet my needs, but these couples say that real, lasting love involves work and the desire to make the marriage succeed. For many, divorce is not even on the table.

Years ago (and today in other cultures) parents would arrange their children’s marriages. In those situations, both bride and groom knew that they would have to learn to love the person they married. I think we have turned it around. Instead of “loving the person we marry,” with our self-centered emphasis, we say we must “marry the person we love.” So we look and date and try relationships to find our romantic ideal, the one “just right” for us.

Let’s not return to the days of arranged marriages, but we must return to the truth that love means commitment,  that it must be learned, that it is a verb and means action. Check out 1 Corinthians 13 for a vivid description of true love. Let’s learn from these successful couples and dedicate ourselves to real love based on commitment and unselfish action.

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A New Year with the Basics

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I trust you all had a safe New Year weekend. As we start 2011, the Men of Steel desire to be the strong leaders God intends for us to be, so perhaps your resolution may have been to become a better leader and example to those around you. No one gets strong without the preparation it takes to build up that strength. I like this verse:

“Physical training is good, but training for godliness is much better, promising benefits in this life and in the life to come.” This is a trustworthy saying, and everyone should accept it. 1 Timothy 4:8-9

Each year, people from around the world compete for the title of the world’s strongest man. These competitions are held in exotic locations and feature events like placing heavy stone orbs on top pillars, lifting large numbers of children on one’s back, and pulling double-decker buses down a street (sometimes by their teeth). The strength and determination of these contestants are second to none, but for them to get to the world championships, they have to be disciplined in the way they train, the foods they eat, and the way they recover from injuries. If any one of these three aspects is neglected, the results could be disastrous.

Christians are not typically known for carrying 300-pound weights long distances, but their feats of strength are equally remarkable. I have read stories about people being healed of sickness and disease, families being reunited, and individuals surrendering their lives to Christ. As leaders, there has to be a constant habit of spiritual training. The apostle Paul understood this and made sure Timothy got the message.

The routine is pretty straightforward:

  1. Talk to God, the Lord of heaven and earth, daily.
  2. Tell him your needs and the needs of others.
  3. Thank him for his answers
  4. Let him know how wonderful he is.
  5. Get to know Christ better by reading the Bible.
  6. Learn what your spiritual talents are and begin to use them.
  7. Spend time with other followers, encouraging and challenging them to become more like Christ.
  8. As opportunities arise, tell those who don’t know Jesus about him and his love for them.
  9. Repeat daily.

If properly followed, this outline will provide a lifetime’s worth of challenge and excitement. It’s time to get serious about the faith. It’s time to become truly strong. It’s time to get disciplined.

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Leaders Exercise Self-Control

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Paul addresses the issue of self-control in the list of the fruit of the Spirit (Galatians 5:22-23), and it appears that her ends the list with the one quality that just might hold all the others together.

A person without self-control is like a city with broken-down walls. (Proverbs 25:28)

In ancient times, cities were often surrounded by walls for their protection. If those walls were breached in any way, the city became vulnerable to attack from all sorts of enemies and invading armies. The maintenance of city walls was of constant concern. Nehemiah heard about the walls of Jerusalem being broken down and his soul was so deeply troubled that he wept, mourned and fasted for days (Nehemiah 1:3, 4).

Proverbs 25:28 compares self-control to a city wall. When we maintain self-control, we keep ourselves safe from forces that would drag us down, attack our weaknesses, and prey on our failures. The Bible warns us that losing our self-control can lead to disastrous results. We may have tendencies to lose our tempers easily, gossip about neighbors or coworkers, or criticize those in authority. We may have an unhealthy desire to own lots of stuff, an addiction toward food, or an obsession with television. A careless word, a broken promise, or a disrespectful action is an outward sign that our inner wall of self-control has collapsed. Weak self-control makes us vulnerable to living a life of hypocrisy, and then we lose all credibility as a witness to the freedom and joy we have in Christ.

Developing self-control is not just a matter of “willing” right behavior. We all have experienced the “just do it” break-down. We decide that we will finally regain control of a certain personal weakness only to find a few days later that we have fallen once again to that temptation. Self-control is not as simple as just “doing it” or “not doing it.” Paul tells us that the Holy Spirit desires to guide our lives. Only he can overcome our sinful desires and build self-control. As we turn our daily routine over to the direction of the Holy Spirit, we will find that we are more often able to resist those things that used to prey on our weaknesses. It is with the power of the Holy Spirit alone that our walls of self-control can be securely maintained.

Application: Take an inventory of your life and pinpoint your areas of weakness. Allow the Holy Spirit access to your desires, attitudes and lifestyle, and have the courage to make changes as needed. It’s one thing to desire the Spirit to control us, it is another to allow the Spirit to control us. Take courage, self-control is a life long process of God working on us to conform us to the image of his Son. Make progress each and every day. Rejoice in the victories and seek forgiveness and reconciliation when you fail. Encourage one another because there is strength in numbers!As you lead, take others along with you; pass on the qualities of leadership that God teaches you.

Leaders Focus on the Goal

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In the ministry there are lots of important things to be done; but many times the urgent things take priority. You know how it works, probably happens in your office, too. You have your list of things that you alone need to take care of and other people come and make their agenda, your agenda. I learned long ago (although not perfect in this) that saying “no” to a lot of good things can be liberating, because it allows you plenty of time to take care of the important tasks.

I have a friend with a servant heart who told me a story. One day he was ready to leave the office and a co-worker asked for some help on a project. After a few moments of helping, it appeared the co-worker had dumped the project, walked out the door and headed home, leaving my friend with the other guy’s project. One tends to not want to help if this is the sort of abuse one can expect.

Take a look at this episode in the life of Jesus:

Jesus’ brothers said to him, “Leave here and go to Judea, where your followers can see your miracles! You can’t become famous if you hide like this! If you can do such wonderful things, show yourself to the world!” (John 7:3-4)

Jesus was under pressure from his brothers, they wanted him to go to the Feast of Tabernacles early and show off his miracle-performing abilities. John 7:5 also tells us that not even these brother were believing in him. Like many Jews, these brothers were looking for someone to “wow” the crowds and eventually lead the people in a rebellion against the Romans. The Feast would have been an ideal platform for launching Jesus’ political career.

Jesus could not be persuaded to become a crowd-pleaser. He knew that his mission on earth was not to win fans, but to redeem people from their sin. Keeping his ultimate purpose in mind, Jesus chose to go to the festival, but in secret (John 7:10). In his wisdom, Jesus could not be persuaded away from his purpose, not even for one day of miracles and popularity. His choice to enter the festival quietly led to a day of heated debates with his enemies and intense discussions with the crowd but no flashy miracles (John 7:11-12, 14, 25, 30). By the end of the day, “many among the crowds at the Temple believed in him” (John 7:31).

Regardless of the agenda others have, a leader needs to stand firm and keep their goal in focus. Leaders with integrity know that they cannot allow themselves to be persuaded to cave in to people-pleasing or glory-grabbing decisions. Pursuing integrity may not always be the popular or easy path, but it usually proves to be the wiser path.

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Servant Leadership

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I like reading on topics about leadership, mentoring, and discipleship. I recently participated in the Dave Ramsey EntreLeadership event (held at Regent University). The seminar was primarily for business owners but the principles learned (many which I’ll share in later posts) can be adapted to my church staff leadership situation, and as I seek to lead others to be ministry and small group leaders. Another servant leadership promoter is Ken Blanchard, the one minute manager guy. He has an entire ministry focusing on Jesus as the ultimate example of leadership (Lead Like Jesus). Men, as you consider your leadership qualities, have you emphasized developing as a servant-leader?

He sat down, called the twelve disciples over to him, and said, “Whoever wants to be first must take last place and be the servant of everyone else.” (Mark 9:35)

The world tells us that leadership is about power and domination. The stronger, richer, smarter, and better looking you are, the better leader you’ll be. Studies have even shown that a beautiful woman will get a job before a plain woman, even if the latter is more qualified. The world looks on the outwardly aspects as a form of leadership. But that”s a leadership that only goes so far and can actually hinder your influence on people around you.

True leadership is found on the inside. It’s the leader who humbles himself and puts others’ needs before his own. It’s the boss who is willing to put in the extra hours to help you with the work instead of cutting out early. It’s the pastor or staff person who sees himself as much of a sinner as everyone else. In order to be a good leader, you have to learn how to serve others, to put others before you.

Jesus shows us true leadership. Even when he was incredibly weary from travel, he would help and heal. The night before his death, he washed his disciples’ feet. He never asked to be honored on earth, and he’s the Son of God! Jesus knew what it meant to be a leader.

Application: How do you lead the people around you? Do you find yourself becoming authoritarian? Do you lead from a position or a purpose? Do you influence people with fancy words, a nice house, and fancy clothes? Do you influence people by helping them move, cooking a meal for them, or washing the dishes? Husbands, as a leader in the home, do you take the time to make the bed or fold the laundry, straighten the kitchen? We can show our love and God’s love through our service to others. Take inventory on how you use your time to serve those in need. Are you a godly influence?

God Calls us to Sexual Purity

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Last year about this time we began challenging the congregation to read the Bible in 90 Days. As we went through the Old Testament, there were some pretty “R” rated (if not “X” rated) passages. I heard about one family traveling on a trip with the grandchildren, reading the Bible aloud while the other was driving. They had to stop reading out loud because the kids where listening! Grandma just couldn’t read certain passages and speak the words aloud. Leviticus 18 is one of those chapters. As I work with men, statistics tell me that when it comes to sexual purity, men who are in church are not too much different than men outside of the church. Purity is a desire, but impurity is a great temptation.

Leviticus 18 contains a series of laws that have to do with sexual expression (except for Leviticus 18:21, which forbids child sacrifice, which is really a whole other topic). We might wonder why God didn’t simply say, “Have sexual relations only with your spouse,” rather than offer such detail in the form: “Do not have sexual relations with… (you name it).”

The answer to this question comes in Leviticus 18:3. God is leading the Israelites out of Egypt, where various forms of sexual immorality were common, into the land of Canaan, where the people do the very things Leviticus 18 prohibits. As Leviticus 18:27 explains, “All these detestable activities are practiced by the people of the land where I am taking you, and this is how the land has become defiled.” God was concerned that the Israelites would easily be tempted to imitate the Canaanites’ sexual impurity, so he spelled out graphically the relationships in which sexual activity was forbidden. He knew that his people were like young children who needed specific instructions and prohibitions.

Although our context differs a lot from that of the Israelites, we face a pretty similar situation. We live today in a culture that endorses unimaginable sexual activity. Even though our society still agrees with Leviticus 18 about some things, like the wrongness of sex with a close relative, our world presents us with new challenges to our sexual holiness, like readily available pornography.

The New Testament does not really offer an updated list of sexual “don’ts,” like a new rulebook for Christian sexual conduct. Rather, it calls us to holiness in every part of our lives, including our sexuality (see 1 Thessalonians 4:3-8). We should not imitate the ways of our world when it comes to sexual expression, but we are to devote our whole being to God, which includes our bodies. We are to live each day with the realization that our bodies are the temples of the Holy Spirit (1 Corinthians 6:18-20). So, we have the obligation and privilege of honoring God with our bodies. When we take this calling seriously, each day we will desire to dishonor God with our bodies less and less. We will seek to give him all that we are, all the time, giving Him honor.

Application: In what areas of life are you tempted to compromise in the are of purity? How have you come to realize your weaknesses? What safeguards have you set in place? What in our culture tempts you to set aside God’s standards for sexuality? What helps you to live according to God’s standards? What lures you to adopt the ways of our fallen culture? What has been your track record over the past few months? If you wish to start over, what prevents you from confession, restoration and commitment to purity (1 John 1:9)? Who is the man who holds you accountable? Whom are you holding accountable, your neighbor, brother, son, co-worker?

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Act on Your Thankfulness

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Years ago in college I was a part of a musical called Bright New Wings, and was able to play the character of the healed leper. The story is in Luke 17, where Jesus heals 10 lepers, yet only one returns to thank Him:

As Jesus continued on toward Jerusalem, he reached the border between Galilee and Samaria. As he entered a village there, ten lepers stood at a distance, crying out, “Jesus, Master, have mercy on us!” He looked at them and said, “Go show yourselves to the priests.” And as they went, they were cleansed of their leprosy. One of them, when he saw that he was healed, came back to Jesus, shouting, “Praise God!” He fell to the ground at Jesus’ feet, thanking him for what he had done. This man was a Samaritan. Jesus asked, “Didn’t I heal ten men? Where are the other nine? Has no one returned to give glory to God except this foreigner?” And Jesus said to the man, “Stand up and go. Your faith has healed you.” (Luke 17:11-19)

This story illustrates the importance of being thankful for things that others may take for granted. To me, it also speaks of the importance of living in the moment. How many times do we carry on about our business, neglecting the wonder of the moment we are in? Perhaps that is what happened to the other nine lepers. Selfishness and a casual attitude toward Christ kept them from returning to give thanks.

I believe that during this time of Thanksgiving, we need to put into practice what we have learn learned. Act on it. How about today, each of us finding five people and thanking them for something specific. Not around the thanksgiving table, but now. Will you pick up the phone, get on Facebook, or write a note to someone you are truly thankful for? Tell them specifically why you are thankful for them (and no, just for “being you” isn’t specific enough). Your Thanksgiving weekend will get off to a fantastic start, and maybe have more to talk about around the table.

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What to Do With the Bible

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The Bible is a great book because it divinely inspired and supplies us with the knowledge of God, His plan of redemption and mission for the world, as well as the knowledge of the nature of mankind, and of the universe. No other book can be compared to it on these topics. It not only informs us about these important truths, but it also tells us what we are to do with this information and truth. The Bible is our only source of faith and practice, so we ought to:

1. “Read it” (Nehemiah 8:8). May we read slowly, carefully, prayerfully, in large portions, repeatedly, reverently and with a willing spirit to follow what it says.

2. “Believe it” (Romans 10:8). Since it is the Word of God, it has been given to us to increase our faith in God and His working in the world.

3. “Receive it” (James 1:21). It is the grafted word that is to be received as the soil received the seed, or the tree receives the graft. Taking the Word of God in our lives, allowing it to grow and to bear its own fruit in motives and actions.

4. “Taste it” (Hebrews 6:5). It is the good Word of God. Some seem to be afraid of the Bible for fear it will require them to do something they do not wish to do. Don’t be afraid; it is good and right in all its requirements.

5. “Eat it” (Jeremiah 15:16). Eating it suggests that we not only taste but actually live by it, as Jesus said, “You shall not live by bread alone, but by every word that comes from the mouth of God” (Matthew 4:4).

6. “Hold it fast” (Titus 1:9). The Bible is faithful. All the promises are true and will come to pass. All its history is true and has been or will be confirmed. All its statements are true, about God, mankind, living and salvation. Therefore we are not to put our in it, but put our faith upon it.

7. “Hold it forth” (Philippians 2:16). The Bible is the Word of Life. All who come under its teaching will feel its life giving power.

8. “Preach it” (2 Timothy 4:2). Here it is called simply the Word. It suggests that we are not to preach just parts of it or any one section of it, but to preach it in its entirety and fullness.

9. “Search it” (Jeremiah 29:13). This word “seek” suggests work and patience (Endeavor, Inquire, Inquiry, Require, Seek). The Greek word carries the idea of “ransack” as the housewife goes through the home at housecleaning time; or “to track” as the hunter laboriously follows the game through the brush, so we are to search for truth and run down the tracks of God’s revelations to man.

10. “Study it” (2 Timothy 2:15). Here is a word that means close application to the Word of God, as the builder carefully studies the plans of the architect before building the structure.

11. “Meditate on it” (Psalm 1:2). This word has much the same meaning as “eat” because it means literally “to chew the cud.” Turning the Word of God over and over in the mind until the sweetness of its message feeds our souls.

12. “Compare it” (1 Corinthians 2:13). We don’t often do this. It is not so much what we do with the Scriptures as what the Holy Spirit does with them in our hearts. This is a divine commentary always at hand. Or as John puts it (1 John 2:27) “Now as for you, the anointing that you received from him resides in you, and you have no need for anyone to teach you. But as his anointing teaches you about all things, it is true and is not a lie. Just as it has taught you, you reside in him.”

13. “Rightly divide it” (2 Timothy 2:15). This is not an arbitrary division of subjects but following a line of truth from the first place mentioned to the last place mentioned; noticing it in relation to other truths and as the word literally means “the cutting of a straight line” of truth in the Bible.

14. “Delight in it” (Psalm 37:4, 119:92). Seven times in this Psalm the Psalmist speaks of delighting in God’s word. This should always be the heart ambition and attitude.

* Based on “What to Do With the Bible” by the Reverend W. H. Pike, frontier preacher and pastor from Ontario to Alberta, Canada around a hundred years ago.

Leaders in a Dark Valley

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I read just yesterday about several pastors who resigned their churches and “are available for interim or other full time work.” It broke my heart because I interpreted this to mean they had no other choices but to leave their position due to some sort of issue(s). I talked to a former pastor friend of mine the other evening and he left his pastorate for personal reasons but we talked about a lot of the dysfunction that is in the DNA of the congregation.

I read this leadership devotion just this morning and wanted to pass it on to you. Taking courage because His presence will not leave you:

Even when I walk through the darkest valley, I will not be afraid, for you are close beside me. Your rod and your staff protect and comfort me. (Psalm 23:4)

Life in general is filled with highs and lows, but it can especially be apparent for those in Christian ministry leadership positions. Just look at how many pastors, youth ministers, and worship directors eventually leave ministry. The work wears on a person. The constant complaints of doing too little of this or too much of that can drain anyone. As a leader, you are expected to be there for everyone at every moment of the day. No one is able to be there at all times. Still, guilt fills the mind and causes you to doubt your ministry and your effectiveness.

Yet, we are not left alone in this world. Through the darkest valleys of life, through the most difficult times of ministry, God is with us. As we lead his people, we can rest knowing that God leads us. When things get tight, the problems don’t seem to go away, and we struggle with guilt–the false guilt of not being able to be there for everyone–God will comfort us. He shields us even during the assaults of bitter people and harsh words. He will always lead us in a path meant to protect us and keep us strong.

When the road is dark and tough, God will guide and protect you. When you feel overwhelmed with loneliness, the Lord is close beside you. When your heart is asking hard questions and you feel beaten down, God will sustain you. We don’t need to live in fear, for God is always with you. He is willing to comfort and protect you. He guides you through every mountain and valley of life. He is your true Leader/Shepherd. And the more you trust him as Lord, the more you will experience the wonder of having a Shepherd.

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